When two people meet, like each other,
and start a relationship most times it is for the purpose of friendship, sex, money
and or companionship.
In recent times sex and money play the
ultimate role as the major things been sought by both parties. Gone are the
things that are supposed to make the relationship stronger, for every hurt
comes experience and with it knowledge.
Most men have Egos so big it would
take a tractor to deflate and women look for the superficial in their
relationships (fat bank accounts, flashy cars and nice house to top the list)
missing the obvious and more important factors. The time when couples worked hard
together to make things better and start a family bond stronger than any other
is long gone. No one here says the man
shouldn’t be the provider of the family but women work with your men here he
cannot do it all alone even if you are a house wife.
Let me site an example before I begin
my main story. In a family where the husband is the sole breadwinner, caters to
their every need of the family including house cleaning, the wife is a
housewife. Now, the wife stays home all
day doing nothing, the maid helps her with everything else needed like cooking
of breakfast and dinner including care of the children who already attend
schools, the driver takes the children to school and back (while being very
badly behaved and not properly trained), the husband gets home after close of
work around 7pm the wife is sleeping and there is no food on the table. The
wife instructs the maid not to begin to prepare dinner till 9pm, while the food
tastes like shit. How does this trend start??
Woman, why be so lazy??
Let me site an example of a beginning,
Dipo and Temi meet at the club, they start dating and things begin to develop
from there. They begin to meet more frequently and one thing leads to another
Temi gets pregnant but says to Dipo, abortion is not an option. Dipo says “I am
not ready to be tied down in marriage yet” but thinks well we have fun together
and great sex why not. After a while they come to an agreement, it’s time for a
meeting of the families and marriage preparations begin in earnest.
Temi’s friends say to her “wow, you
are so lucky to have such a catch” and she goes all blushing and smiling. Dipo’s
friends, some say “seems our young man has been caught by the Love spell going
around” and one sensible one asks “Dip oar you sure you wanna do this?? Im just
asking cos you don’t seem ready to me, but s=don’t let me be a party pooper.
Congratulations man”
The couple to be hardly has time to
see each other during the preparations as the families want them to be united
before the baby comes along. The questions that needed to be asked have been
forgotten or skipped. The usually observant and careful mothers resort to making
sure the Aso-Ebi(materials to be worn by family and friends) is in the right
color, order and enough quantity. They wanna bear the title Grandma before they
can even see the pregnancy reaches full term.
When the dotted lines are signed, the
baby comes, there is no time for honeymoon or the couple getting to know themselves
and all the hidden traits come to the fore.
They realize this thing called Love
was never in the picture. What happens then?? Most couples especially in the
Africans may still try to work it out but that is fast becoming a thing of the
past as divorce rates are on the rise.
Must many lives be ruined before the
gross error becomes glaring??
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